“I’d rather live in a gutter” is what an elderly mother once said in response to her seven adult children fighting over her rather expensive care. Money wasn’t the issue, but the conflict lived on. Mediation was ultimately the answer. However, the mother, who previously had a happy family, had to endure years of turmoil, guilt, and a fractured family that she loved so much. Dementia doesn’t protect our elders from emotional upheaval. While it is sad to watch family members decline, it is also an opportunity for the next generation to make the last years of their parents’ lives as peaceful as possible. How do we do that? • If arguments start happening, bring in a mediator sooner rather than later. Many families wait until there is litigation and that’s too late. • A family counselor can also be helpful to provide a sounding board so that all voices can be heard. In that way, it is similar to … Read More
How Do We All Get Along?
One thing that we can all agree on is that the level of our private and public discourse has reached a low point and is unacceptable to most of us. In addition to being unpleasant, we are also not solving the critical and urgent problems facing us as a world, a nation, and often our families. One of the aspects of dealing with difficult issues is that they do need complex and diverse thinking to solve them; If they were easily solved, they wouldn’t still be with us. Many of our problems need people from different viewpoints to come together and offer their ideas with wisdom and open-mindedness to find an outcome within that synergy. How do we do this? 1. Let’s approach each person we encounter with an open mind and heart. We truly are all in this together and there probably really is more we have in common than what divides us. We want to look for what … Read More