One thing that we can all agree on is that the level of our private and public discourse has reached a low point and is unacceptable to most of us. In addition to being unpleasant, we are also not solving the critical and urgent problems facing us as a world, a nation, and often our families.
One of the aspects of dealing with difficult issues is that they do need complex and diverse thinking to solve them; If they were easily solved, they wouldn’t still be with us. Many of our problems need people from different viewpoints to come together and offer their ideas with wisdom and open-mindedness to find an outcome within that synergy.
How do we do this?
1. Let’s approach each person we encounter with an open mind and heart. We truly are all in this together and there probably really is more we have in common than what divides us. We want to look for what we have in common.
2. Most of us share the same general priorities and values of freedom, safety, education, health, the well-being of our loved ones, democracy, good government ….where we get into trouble is our tendency to look for and focus on differences. We differ in what each of these means and how to get there. Most of us have children, aging parents, health concerns, dogs and cats, we like or don’t like travel, we like or don’t like cooking, we like walking on the beach, or yoga or reading or whatever. The list of potential common interests is endless. Before any problem solving occurs, focusing on what we have in common is critical.
3. Problem-solving is different than debate, and it’s valuable to know the difference. The problems that we face today, are not ones that can be resolved in casual conversation at Thanksgiving dinner or on Facebook. They are complex, difficult, and require balanced and diverse thinking. Creating a space for problem-solving requires planning, intention, well-educated people, and people of goodwill who really want to find a resolution. It has been shown that people of diverse opinions and backgrounds can and do find profound outcomes by coming together. We need to do more of this.
4. Ken Cloke, a world-recognized mediator, author, and teacher, offers the suggestion of inviting each other in. Be willing to be known and use our authentic voices. Listen. There is grace in being willing to know and hear others.
5. “One Small Step”, an effort to overcome differences, similarly offers a space where very different and divergent people come together to find harmony across the political divide. Dave Isay, its founder, is creating a new map for us to connect and communicate by bringing strangers together for meaningful interactions.
6. Putting some of these ideas into practice in small ways can start changing our world. Kindness does matter. Equally as important is to
work together to stop the pain and suffering within the unsolved issues in our world.
7. Maybe together we can find resolutions to our environmental issues, diseases, climate change, health care, education, garbage, government efficiency, plastic, homelessness, elder care, and the list goes on. At least we’ll find more satisfaction, peace, and happiness in feeling as though we’re solving things together. We can start by honoring and respecting each other by listening.
I can provide information about out-of-court conflict resolution in divorce, custody/ parenting time, families, marriages, workplace disputes, businesses, trusts and estates, real estate, homeowners associations, as well as problem-solving between individuals. As a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst®, I am qualified to help you sort through the myriad financial issues that you may be encountering.
I am here to support you. Tricia Morris – 808.283.7811 – Tricia@TriciaMorris.com